Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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