I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize