sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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