i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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