i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
