And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
