I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
