i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
