Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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