I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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