To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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