Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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