i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
