singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize