so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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