The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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