like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize