Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
