Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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