Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
