i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Randomize