I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
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