K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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