Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize