I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
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