Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The power of my boobs compel you
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
