i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
