dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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