then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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