and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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