If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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