I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
