If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
