She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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