I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
