she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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