apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I don't want my vagina anymore.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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