Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
whose ass print is on the piano?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
