Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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