from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
