I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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