No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
