Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
