i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
