Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
