i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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