$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
