Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
