I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
