If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
