GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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