Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
