I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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